Parents and caretakers who bring their children to see me to address boundary challenges quickly realize that I’m a huge advocate of also involving them in the therapy process. This is partly because caretakers tend to underestimate their ability to support their littles. Confidence can falter, especially in moments of dysregulation for both caretaker and child. And at a certain point, the focus becomes, “Please fix my child’s bad behavior.”

While it’s true that objective, professional support is valuable and can help turn things in a positive direction, it’s also true that parents play an essential role in implementing and maintaining positive change - otherwise, it’s unlikely that any meaningful shifts will stick. My role as the child’s therapist includes serving as a teacher and guide to the family, first and foremost helping caretakers look beneath their child’s behaviors.

This month, I’m sharing a tool that EMDR therapists use as a calming and grounding resource with clients who are reprocessing traumatic and upsetting memories. In my experience, this technique benefits not only EMDR therapy clients, but most everyone experiencing moments of fear, anxiety, sadness or any upsetting emotion. While it’s ideal to learn this technique from an experienced mental health professional, the concept can easily be adapted and implemented to use on your own and/or with your loved ones.

If you’ve ever asked yourself whether therapy is “working”, you’re not alone. Especially when progress seemingly slows or reaches an impasse, you may wonder if your therapist understands and relates to you in a way that meets your expectations and/or has the skillset you’re seeking. Or you simply might feel impatient to feel better. These are all reasonable concerns to occasionally reflect upon.

Continuing from last month’s blog post, “When Everyday Transitions Feel Big, Part 1: Adults” this month’s focus is about kids who struggle with day-to-day transitions/changes and how you can help your little move through them with more ease.

Let’s review the many transitions that humans experience, starting from the moment we enter the world. (anchor link to Part 1 blog that lists examples of kid’s transitions). While some littles transition seamlessly, others are thrown for a loop. Reasons for transition troubles vary, but unexpected changes to routine and a lack of routine are frequent culprits.

Do you wonder why it’s hard to go with the flow, even when you know what the flow is? Difficulty leaving home or work? Do transitions, expected or unexpected, throw you for a loop?

This blog post talks about those “seemingly small” transitions that are part of life, yet somehow feel triggering. I list examples of transitions from infancy through adulthood, discuss potential reasons we get stuck and offer suggestions to move through tough moments with more ease.